Not only are the physics in this movie not from around here, they're not even logical. For instance, we have a force field around an underwater city which keeps water out but which a human who is over 80% water can walk through. This same highly advanced force field technology is later used on the battle field by an otherwise primitive race of beings who use beasts of burden for transportation and catapults and spears for weapons. The catapults throw giant blue marbles which explode on contact. However, even though the primitive beings have the technology for explosives they can't seem to come up with gunpowder.

In the great battle scene, the bad guys drive up in giant tanks and attempt to blast the good guys who are protected by their force field. This force field is transparent to visible light but nevertheless repels blasts of visible laser beams. Thwarted by their attempt to use blasters, the bad guys then slowly unload a droid army from the front of their tanks. This in itself defies logic. Why use armored vehicles to protect your troops if you're going to openly expose them to danger when you're parked in plain sight of your enemy? A single WWII vintage 50 cal machine gun could have turned the entire army of droid tin men into a pile of tin cans.

Once unloaded, the tin men came to life and marched forward, effortlessly passing through the force field's wall! Once again, we were left wondering why the bad guys wasted their money on a droid army when the force field was clearly incapable of stopping a metal object. A few marines with a machine gun could have easily done the job for a lot less expense.

We won't reveal the ending of the climatic battle scene for those who haven't seen it, but we do have a few nagging questions. First, why would anyone design a droid army which was entirely dependent on receiving signals from a mother ship in outer space. Second, why were none of the good guys smart enough to figure this out and jam the signals.

The battle scene was only one of many which depended on comic book physics. There was the flying junk yard dealer, Watto, with wings so small they couldn't possibly provide enough lift, the movements of the Jedi which appeared to have been pulled straight from B-grade gung fu movies, the incomprehensible pod race physics, not to mention a six year old poverty stricken, fatherless, slave boy who nevertheless had the time and resources to build a high-tech pod racer and an artificial life form.

As nerds, we are distraught by being forced to write a bad review of a nerd culture icon. We love you Mr. Lucas and we love the Star Wars series. This is why the last one pains us so greatly. Please kill off Jar Jar Binks and give us some Star Wars physics we can work with. We beg of you!